I have a tendency to want life to be perfect.
In my perfect world, I would be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed at 5am. I would be able to hop right out of bed, do some yoga, meditate and enjoy a cup of tea and the news all before the kids are awake! I would keep our lunches healthy and varied and be able to cook an entirely healthy dinner for my family every night. I would have a spotless, well-decorated house, clean clothes and beautiful gardens while still being able to spend a huge portion of my day playing with my kids. I would go on regular playdates, arriving on time!, and be home in time to ensure that my kids get restful naps every afternoon. I would workout for a good chunk of time every night and be at a perfect weight so I could wear clothes that look pulled together. I would do a little side work every day to make some extra spending money, read a book a week, enjoy time with my girlfriends every week and enjoy quality time with my husband every night.
In reality, there are only so many hours in a day and some things are more important than others. I know that life is not perfect, but I still do what I can to get as close to my vision as possible. However, I tend to get in the mode of trying too many new things at once to make improvements. I am slowly learning that it's best - and easiest - to add one new thing to my plate at a time. Once that new thing has become routine, I can add another.
I am a perfectionist at heart. I know this and I'm okay with this. I've always been this way. I have a report card from second grade on which my teacher noted that I often erased holes in my papers trying to ensure perfection.
In addition to being a perfectionist, I am also a very routine-oriented person. I do things the same way every time I do them. It's routine for me to make the bed as soon as I get out of it and to get a load of laundry started first thing in the morning. In the shower, I wash up in the same order every day and before bed, I have an order in which I need to get ready. These are things I no longer have to think about. It's also routine for me to read before I go to bed at night... no matter how tired I am, I can't fall asleep without reading something!
Since I began staying home, I've added quite a few new routines to my life. The biggest was school for Charlie. We've become quite comfortable with this addition to our day, although we have a few off weeks, and it's amazing to see what Charlie's learned in a few short months. I think homeschooling him is also good for me because it's forcing me to be a bit more creative and spontaneous than I naturally am.
My most recent addition was my house-cleaning schedule and although it still needs some work, I am LOVING it, and I was happy to find out that Chris has actually noticed. It's preventing me from having to spend hours at a time cleaning the house and it's making me happy to have an organized space at the end of the day. However, the beginning of my week goes well, but by Thursday, I tend to be too tired to do that day's chore (luckily, I've scheduled cleaning the bedrooms for Thursday - they aren't a high traffic area, so it's not a big deal if they're skipped for a week). I'm working on this. :)
Another new addition was scheduling "work" into my day. Last night, I was actually able to get caught up, so from here on out, it should be much easier to maintain. I'll schedule a small task per night and and it will soon become a routine for me.
My next addition will be making working out part of my regular routine. I was an athlete throughout high school (not so much college), and I enjoy exercise. More often than not, I feel on top of the world once I've completed a workout; however, I fall in and out of working out too easily. I think part of the issue, again, is trying to do too much at once. I need to implement taking small steps with working out, just as I have done elsewhere.
It's hard to fit in a workout with two little ones running around, and it can be hard to find the energy at the end of a long day. I've scheduled my workouts for the end of my day as soon as the kids are in bed. My goal is to reacquaint myself with a cardio workout and stretching. Once that's become a routine, I'll begin strength training again. Eventually, I'd like to squeeze some yoga into my day. But, maybe when the boys are a little older and I'm actually able to sleep through the night again..... I need something to look forward to.
The title of my blog, Tryin' to Be Everything, comes from a lyric in the song "American Honey" by Lady Antebellum: "Get caught in the race of this crazy life, tryin' to be everything can make you lose your mind." I often sing this song and try to keep in mind that I can't be and do everything.... But it doesn't stop me from trying. :)